Ever have the experience of not being honest & true to yourself?
Maybe you put someone else first when it wasn’t warranted, or went along with another’s idea of right & wrong just to please them. Maybe you’re the “nice” gal or guy and always have been. Why should you stop now? How dare you not be the one to make everything right, smooth it over, pull it all together and make it look good! Weren’t you taught to be a good girl.
As my Mom’s cancer grew this year, and her body and mind grew weary, she became steady and focused in her choice to die as she pleased.
“Of course I don’t want to have cancer and die,” she said, “but I am dying, and I want to live each day I have free of drugs and interventions. I want to see the beauty of the flowers and the sun shining on the lake and be held by my husband and embraced and cared for by my family.”
She had been a caregiver all her life, and always put others first. This time she dropped into her heart, her love of life and self, and made the decision to die as she wished. She drew on all the strength and skills that she had in order to do what was best for her. And, she passed in integrity, courage and love. She amazed me.
Yesterday I made a choice to live in my integrity and to choose self care over pleasing another. It was a simple choice compared to Mom’s courage, but I have learned that I am worthy of self-love.
I don’t have to spend my time befriending and being polite to another when they drain my energy and when I truly do not have acceptance and forgiveness inside. Time does soften wounds so perhaps one day, when I am ready, I’ll be open to this person. For now, I choose an act of kindness for me, for self care for enjoying my day, and for setting a boundary.
How about you?
Will you allow an act of kindness and love for yourself today?
Perhaps even a revolutionary act of self love!
Send an e-mail & let me know if you do!
Namaste, Susan |